The start of my crossdressing

My Mother started crossdressing me at age four or five. My father was deceased.

Mother dressed me in her panties. I loved wearing her panties. Her panties were silky and felt nice caressing my clit and bottom. I wore only her panties around our house and property. When Mother put me in my wading pool, I knew the white panties had become transparent. I loved the way the panties clung to my clit.

I asked Mother why she made me wear her panties. My Mother told me that she wanted a ***********. She planned to keep me as a girl. I did not mind being a girl for my Mother. My Mother bathed me and helped me dry off. She rubbed a lotion all over my body. My clit always rose to the occasion. The perfume was added to keep me feeling feminine.

Eventually, Mother added half and full slips for my repertoire of feminine lingerie. I enjoyed the extra bit of feminine lingerie. Mother permitted me to sleep in a full slip. I squirmed in bed, rubbing my ciit against the panties and the full slip until I climaxed. I did not know what had happened early in life, but Mother disapproved of the soiled spots in my panties or slips. My Mother threatened to cut off my testicles with scissors. She did bring out scissors and place them around my testicles. I pleaded with her not to cut off my testicles. Now, I wish she had castrated me.

As punishment, I had to hand-wash Mother's and my lingerie. While dressed in a bra and panties, I had to hang our lingerie outside on the clothesline. If I did not wash the lingerie properly, I had to lower my panties, exposing my tiny clit, and stand in the corner facing Mother. I had to keep my bra on. If Mother saw my clit getting hard, she used a flyswatter on my clit as discipline. A proper girl would not enjoy being exposed in her feminine lingerie.

As I got older, my tiny sissy clit made more of a dent in my panties. Mother used a flyswatter to discourage any bulge in the panty. If the swelling was noticeable, I had to pull my panty down to my knees and spread my legs while lying on the bed or on the floor. It was easy for Mother to strike my sissy clit while I was in that position. Also, Mother threatened to cut off my testicles with scissors. She placed the scissors around a testicles various times. Now, I wish she had cut them off. Mother wrapped robber bands around my testicles at various times. I had to remain exposed to her during these times. I did wear my bra, stockings, and heels. I believe this treatment kept my clit very tiny and feminine.

When my Mother added a garter belt, stockings, and heels, I felt like a female. Mother told me a "good girl" wore her panty beneath the garter belt straps. A "bad girl" wore the garter belt straps inside her panty. I preferred the "bad girl" method. I learned the total freedom of being pantiless while wearing a bra, garter belt, stockings, and heels. When pantiless, my clit received more punishment. Mother started tying a pink ribbon around each testicle and my clit to discourage any excitement. Also, I had to wear a pink ribbon and bow as a necklace. I enjoyed wearing the ribbons for Mother.

As Mother added more lingerie to the collection of my lingerie, I noticed that Mother started to loosen up. I caught a glimpse of her breasts down the bodice of her dress. Mother had adorable and well-formed breasts.

As summer temperatures increased, Mother started to wear only lingerie in the house. The house was not air-conditioned. Any wind coming in a window cooled the house. Mother began to wear a full slip, bra, and panties. I loved watching Mother's breasts move in the bodice of a full slip. I imagined the joy of being able to feel your breasts move as a woman walked or bent over to pull up her stocking or pick up an item.

I dressed similarly, wearing my sissy lingerie, which included a bra, garter belt, stockings, and heels, with a ribbon tied to my clit and a ribbon necklace. Mother enjoyed jerking on the ribbon tied to my clit if she saw any excitement. I wanted Mother to see my excited clit since I enjoyed the ribbon tied around my testicles and clit, and her pulling on the ribbon. I appreciated having a ribbon tied around my testicles and clit. I knew my Mother's love was special to make me a girl. To this day, I love someone jerking the ribbon tied around each testicle and my clit head.

My Mother and I shopped together. I was always dressed as a female. I loved wearing skirts, dressing, and feeling the wind play with my skirt or dress. It was a pleasure to feel the wind caress my stocking-covered legs and clit covered by my panties. It was thrilling to go into a changing room with Mother. We both stripped down to a bra and panties to try on lingerie or dresses.

My maternal Grandmother lived nearby and came over frequently. She learned of my crossdressing immediately. She did not seem to have a problem with me wearing lingerie. If I were at her house, my clit would show a small amount of excitement in my panties. She reached into my panties and adjusted my clit. She did not punish me like my Mother did. I loved washing my Grandmother's lingerie and hanging it up to dry on the clothes line.

Both my Mother and Grandmother had wonderful, colorful slips. Mother had several colorful and soft petticoats. When she permitted, I wore her chiffon petticoats. I truly felt like a girl in these soft, colorful petticoats.

A few times, I climbed out my bedroom window and went for walks in town wearing a bra, slip, or petticoats along with a garter belt, stockings, and heels.. I felt so feminine. I have no idea what I would have done if someone stopped me.