The Start of a New Era - Continuation
Hey, it’s Marla again. If you’ve been following my journey, you know I’ve been navigating this wild, beautiful, and sometimes messy path of self-discovery through crossdressing. It’s been a ride—equal parts thrilling and terrifying—but every step has brought me closer to understanding who I am. Lately, I’ve been diving deeper into exploring my desires, my body, and the parts of myself I used to shy away from. This chapter of my story gets a little more intimate, a little more raw, as I lean into the sexual side of my identity as a crossdresser.
After those first few outings, where I found my footing in the world as Marla, I started to feel more comfortable in my skin. The drag shows, the LGBTQ+ cafes, the late-night walks in my favorite dresses—they were all building my confidence. But there was another layer to my journey that I hadn’t fully explored yet: my sexuality. Sure, I’d had that one intense encounter that left me reeling, but it opened a door I couldn’t stop thinking about. I wanted to understand what I liked, what made me feel alive, and how my body could be a part of this newfound freedom.
One evening, after a long day at work, I came home and slipped into a soft, silky nightgown. The way it hugged my body felt electric, like I was shedding the weight of the day and stepping into Marla’s world. I lit a few candles, put on some music, and decided to spend the night getting to know myself better. I started with my makeup, taking my time to perfect my eyeliner and lipstick, feeling the transformation happen in the mirror. But this time, it wasn’t just about the look—it was about the sensation, the anticipation.
I lay down on my bed, the nightgown sliding against my skin, and let my hands wander. I’d always been curious about my body, but I’d never given myself permission to explore it fully. My fingers traced over my chest, my thighs, and then lower, lingering in places I’d once ignored out of shame. I let myself relax, focusing on what felt good. It was slow, deliberate, and intimate—my fingers exploring, teasing, discovering. I found myself drawn to the idea of fingering first, as I always used small dildo, fingers never been on top my mind, something I’d thought about but never dared to try. I grabbed some lube from my bedside drawer and took my time, letting curiosity guide me. The sensations were new, intense, and unexpectedly empowering. It wasn’t just physical; it was like I was claiming a part of myself I’d kept locked away.
That night was a turning point. I realized that my body, just like my identity, was mine to explore and enjoy. Crossdressing wasn’t just about the clothes or the makeup—it was about how I felt in my own skin, how I connected with my desires. I started to incorporate this exploration into my routine, sometimes dressing up in my favorite outfits and letting my hands wander, other times keeping it simple with just my body and my curiosity. Each time, I learned something new about what I liked, what made me feel feminine, and what made me feel powerful.
As I grew more comfortable with self-exploration, I started to crave connection again—not just random encounters, but something deeper, something that honored Marla. I went back to the LGBTQ+ bar where I’d felt so welcomed before. This time, I wore a fitted black dress that made me feel bold and sexy, paired with my favorite heels. I wasn’t there to perform or hide; I was there to be myself. I met someone—a guy who was kind and curious. We talked for a bit about life, identity, and everything in between. When the conversation turned to attraction, I felt a spark I hadn’t expected. I was upfront about being a crossdresser, about my journey, and he listened with genuine interest.
Later that night, we ended up back at my place. I was nervous but excited, my heart racing as I led him inside. I felt beautiful in my dress, my makeup still flawless, and I wanted to share this part of myself. We started slow, kissing and touching, and I guided his hands to where I wanted them. It was my first time exploring this with someone I know, not just a random Grindr encounter, and it felt like a celebration of Marla—my femininity, my desires, my truth. The experience was intense, intimate, and affirming. It wasn’t just about the physical act; it was about being seen and accepted as Marla, without judgment.
That night, and the ones that followed, taught me that my crossdressing and my sexuality were intertwined parts of my identity. I wasn’t just dressing up to look a certain way; I was expressing who I am, inside and out. I still don’t go full-time as Marla—my life is a balance of worlds—but I’ve embraced the joy of sex, the thrill of anal and oral, and the freedom of being unapologetically me. Each outfit, each moment of self-discovery, each connection I make brings me closer to living my truth.
I’m still figuring it all out, but I’m not afraid anymore. Marla is here to stay, and she’s ready to keep exploring, keep growing, and keep loving every part of this journey.
After those first few outings, where I found my footing in the world as Marla, I started to feel more comfortable in my skin. The drag shows, the LGBTQ+ cafes, the late-night walks in my favorite dresses—they were all building my confidence. But there was another layer to my journey that I hadn’t fully explored yet: my sexuality. Sure, I’d had that one intense encounter that left me reeling, but it opened a door I couldn’t stop thinking about. I wanted to understand what I liked, what made me feel alive, and how my body could be a part of this newfound freedom.
One evening, after a long day at work, I came home and slipped into a soft, silky nightgown. The way it hugged my body felt electric, like I was shedding the weight of the day and stepping into Marla’s world. I lit a few candles, put on some music, and decided to spend the night getting to know myself better. I started with my makeup, taking my time to perfect my eyeliner and lipstick, feeling the transformation happen in the mirror. But this time, it wasn’t just about the look—it was about the sensation, the anticipation.
I lay down on my bed, the nightgown sliding against my skin, and let my hands wander. I’d always been curious about my body, but I’d never given myself permission to explore it fully. My fingers traced over my chest, my thighs, and then lower, lingering in places I’d once ignored out of shame. I let myself relax, focusing on what felt good. It was slow, deliberate, and intimate—my fingers exploring, teasing, discovering. I found myself drawn to the idea of fingering first, as I always used small dildo, fingers never been on top my mind, something I’d thought about but never dared to try. I grabbed some lube from my bedside drawer and took my time, letting curiosity guide me. The sensations were new, intense, and unexpectedly empowering. It wasn’t just physical; it was like I was claiming a part of myself I’d kept locked away.
That night was a turning point. I realized that my body, just like my identity, was mine to explore and enjoy. Crossdressing wasn’t just about the clothes or the makeup—it was about how I felt in my own skin, how I connected with my desires. I started to incorporate this exploration into my routine, sometimes dressing up in my favorite outfits and letting my hands wander, other times keeping it simple with just my body and my curiosity. Each time, I learned something new about what I liked, what made me feel feminine, and what made me feel powerful.
As I grew more comfortable with self-exploration, I started to crave connection again—not just random encounters, but something deeper, something that honored Marla. I went back to the LGBTQ+ bar where I’d felt so welcomed before. This time, I wore a fitted black dress that made me feel bold and sexy, paired with my favorite heels. I wasn’t there to perform or hide; I was there to be myself. I met someone—a guy who was kind and curious. We talked for a bit about life, identity, and everything in between. When the conversation turned to attraction, I felt a spark I hadn’t expected. I was upfront about being a crossdresser, about my journey, and he listened with genuine interest.
Later that night, we ended up back at my place. I was nervous but excited, my heart racing as I led him inside. I felt beautiful in my dress, my makeup still flawless, and I wanted to share this part of myself. We started slow, kissing and touching, and I guided his hands to where I wanted them. It was my first time exploring this with someone I know, not just a random Grindr encounter, and it felt like a celebration of Marla—my femininity, my desires, my truth. The experience was intense, intimate, and affirming. It wasn’t just about the physical act; it was about being seen and accepted as Marla, without judgment.
That night, and the ones that followed, taught me that my crossdressing and my sexuality were intertwined parts of my identity. I wasn’t just dressing up to look a certain way; I was expressing who I am, inside and out. I still don’t go full-time as Marla—my life is a balance of worlds—but I’ve embraced the joy of sex, the thrill of anal and oral, and the freedom of being unapologetically me. Each outfit, each moment of self-discovery, each connection I make brings me closer to living my truth.
I’m still figuring it all out, but I’m not afraid anymore. Marla is here to stay, and she’s ready to keep exploring, keep growing, and keep loving every part of this journey.
7ヶ月前
