(male offspring) cought mom with Black lover
Dear friends,
The (male offspring) of one of my closest girlfriends turned to me with a problem, he was looking for answers to his questions. He is a (youth soon adult)
He had accidentally caught his mother with a lover, and for him the shock was greater because his mother's lover was a man of color. After the first discovery, the (youth soon adult) has continued to be attentive, you could say that he has secretly been spying on his mother, and he has become sure that for some time, probably a long time, she has had an ongoing relationship with this Black lover. The (youth soon adult) has become sure that his mother has developed strong feelings for the lover and he feels worried about his family and the future.
The (youth soon adult) has great trust in me, he has known me since ch..dhood, among other things I have babysat many times, and he is quite used to turning to me in confidence regarding questions about life. He knows that I take him seriously and that I really care about trying to help and support him with his questions and problems.
And he knows that I have experience of life, of relationships with more than one man, and also knows that I have experience of a man of color (but hopefully he only knows about one of my relationships with only one Black man..?).
The (youth soon adult) told me something like:
"- Lena, I must tell you that my mother is cheating on my father, she has a regular lover. And I believe she loves him, but I do not know if my father knows about it or not. And the lover is a man of color. I just want to ask you what you think, is my mothers love for her Black lover real or is it just a momentary love while they are having sex? ... "
And so on... He had many questions, he was shy and cautious at first, but after a while he told me very openly about things he had come to discover while he secretly sneakde up on them for almost six months. And it was clear that he wanted my opinion on the very fact that his mother's lover was a Black man.
Yes, I du understand that he was curious, maybe much to curious to be ”normal”. As a (youth soon adult), he found it exciting, and that after a while he had begun to experience all of this as sexually arousing, especially the fact that it was a Black man who was his mother's lover...
My answers were something like:
My very y....g man, you are a (youth soon adult) but you probably already know the answer.
That is impossible for me to answer with certainty,
regarding how it is for your mother, her relationship and whether she feels any kind of genuine love for her lover.
Generally and in many cases, from my own experiences, after conversations with my sister and with several of my close female friends, and after conversations with many white girls and women I have met over the years, I can pretty much generally tell you what I know, and what I have learned with quite a lot of certainty.
When women are given the opportunity to experience exceptionally good sex with a man, especially when this happens repeatedly many times, and the longer the relationship lasts, what was initially mostly feelings of horniness develops into a close intimacy with deep and strong feelings in almost all cases. If this is allowed to continue, it is very likely that in the vast majority of cases it will lead to love. At least some kind of love.
If the man repeatedly gives the woman exceptional sexual experiences, if he shows her that his horniness has also led to him starting to have deep and genuine feelings for her, then I am sure that in almost all cases it will lead to the woman developing genuine love for that man.
If she is married and the marriage is good and at least quite happy, if she is satisfied with her husband, if he is still able to make her horny and he still gives her satisfying sex, and she is satisfied with her marriage, then the woman's love for her husband can probably continue, albeit in a slower way, and she will probably start to feel two different kinds of love.
The old love lingers in everyday life and becomes a safe and secure love, albeit quite boring, and will probably not contain any spontaneous hornyness for her.
The new love will then become much hotter, and will contain the hot hornyness and very strong longing for new sexual experiences, and all this will strengthen her love and deepen her feelings for the new man.
But in those cases, in the vast majority of cases, if the woman, your mother, is the least bit dissatisfied with the marriage or with her husband, it will almost certainly lead to her love for her husband sooner or later ending, to be replaced by the new hot and wonderful love and lust for her lover.
I say that this development is largely driven by the woman getting the chance to discover exceptionally good sexual experiences in a new way and in a completely new dimension, that she gets to experience this repeated many times together with this special man and on a level previously completely unknown to her.
And my experience, as well as my sister's and a great many white women that I have talked to, we agree that a great many Black men give us exactly this, that is, exceptionally good sex.
The vast majority of us agree that in almost all cases these Black lovers are completely superior to our white husbands and boyfriends and superior to any white man we have ever met.
All women always agree with me when I say that it is comparable to the fact that almost all Black men are so much better at dancing compared to all regular white men who almost always lack the type of sense of rhythm and the suppleness of the body that almost all Black men and boys seem to have so easily, almost from birth, in a completely natural way.
We women who have experience with Black lovers in real life agree that the same applies, the superiority is always total, both on the dance floor and in bed.
It is difficult, if not impossible, for the vast majority of people to be able to relate to what exceptionally good sex is and what it means. The vast majority do not know what it is and I dare say that most will never experience it in their lives.
I thought I knew. I had had the chance to experience sex in quite a few different ways, and also on occasions very special and especially good sex. I thought it was wonderful and fantastic.
But then when I had the chance to start experiencing sex with my very best Black lover, all my previous concepts were put to rest. It was such a total and sensational awakening, that sexual experiences could be so exceptional, on a level and in a dimension that I had never imagined before, it was actually life-changing.
But it is a given that all the girls and women who have never experienced this, they have no reference and you have to understand that it is impossible for them to grasp.
And it is both obvious and completely understandable that the same applies to all white men. They think that they experience good sex and believe that they have the ability to give their woman wonderful and fantastic sex, which the very best white men also have (but the best are extremely few...). But my experience is that there is hardly any white man who has the opportunity to genuinely and deeply understand what exceptionally good sex means, because this happens in a way and in another dimension that ordinary white men never gain knowledge and experience about.
The very few best white men may believe that they give their woman incredibly good sex, but I know that hardly any white man, not even the few best, has the ability to give his woman exceptionally good sex.
It goes without saying that I unfortunately cannot answer your questions with certainty.
But my personal opinion and experience says that if your mother's relationship with her Black lover continues, the outcome depends a lot on the type of personality your mother has, what your parents' relationship is, and it depends a lot on how your father sees the matter.
If he does not know your mother's relationship with her Black lover today, or if he pretends not to know, then it is quite impossible that he will remain ignorant for very long, or will be able to continue pretending and denying.
If it is his desire that the marriage should continue under all circumstances, if he feels an unconditional love for your mother, then he may be able to accept her infidelity and her relationship with the Black lover. If he already knows this, then he may have given his consent and accepted everything. I know that such arrangements are not at all unusual and I have been taught that in such cases it is always easier for the white husband to accept that the wife has a lover provided it is a Black man, because then the white husband can convince himself that the wife will never leave him for such a man, or at least that the risk of him being left is less in the case the lover is a Black man.
However, I know that when new hot feelings of strong love take over for the woman, the man's skin color hardly matters, in which case it is not at all certain that the white husband's hope has any value...
So, my y. . . g man, I can't give you the answers, but I hope I've been able to give you some understanding of what's going on with your mother, regarding her feelings of love for both your father and for her Black lover, and what's going on in your family.
I know your mother very well and I don't think she currently has any thoughts at all about leaving your father now or in the near future and not splitting up your family. But I'm pretty sure she wants to continue the relationship with her Black lover, at least for a while. It wouldn't end well if your father or someone demanded that your mother end this right now.
The most likely thing is that your father already knows and accepts that your mother has her Black lover, he understands that it wouldn't be wise for him to try to force it to end right now, he has accepted that he would risk being the big loser.
My advice to you is to let your parents handle this in peace, it would only be embarrassing for your father, and it could cause serious problems, if you let him know that you know all this.
If your mother's relationship with the Black lover can continue relatively discreetly, then your father need not feel embarrassed that he has been forced to allow and accept it.
But if it becomes obvious that you know about it, if you discuss the matter with your father, then he may feel that he must act to make it stop if he is not to appear as a weak man, and then you may have caused unnecessary problems for yourself and your family.
And as I understand what you have told me, you do not mind your mother having a Black lover, provided that it does not harm your family, on the contrary, you have accepted this fact, and I have understood that you find it a little exciting.
I understand that you think that all other options, such as your parents having to divorce, are much worse options for you and for your family. So it is really a given that you should do nothing other than continue to pretend that you do not know anything and let the adults handle this in peace.
I would like to ask you to stop spying, but I understand that a (youth soon adult). boy's curiosity about sexual matters, and strong sex drive, means that you are unlikely to be able to fulfill it.
Therefore, this is important, that if you are going to continue spying secretly, you must be wise and do it in such a way that you do not risk being discovered, you must for your own sake and that of your family be wise enough and not create any risks of difficult consequences that you do not want.
- End -
For the reader, I can admit that of course, I have known for a long time that one of my best girlfriends has a lover, and that it is a man of color. It may be that I have encouraged her when she has been curious and has wanted to know everything about my sex life... (And she is not my only girlfriend who has experience with men of color...).
And I have known that her husband has accepted this.
At first very reluctantly, but over time, partly because he has had time to get used to the fact that this is going on regardless of what he wants and partly, most importantly, that their marriage and their own sex life have benefited from it and become better. So the husband has had an easier time accepting it fully because he has also per(male offspring)ally benefited from it.
But I did not know that their (youth soon adult). (male offspring) knew everything, and that moreover, after our conversations, he accepts it, and that he actually finds it exciting. I am quite convinced that he will continue to secretly sneak up on his mother and her Black lover and that the (youth soon adult) will be sexually aroused by this, and he will satisfy himself as all (youth soon adult) boys always do
The (male offspring) of one of my closest girlfriends turned to me with a problem, he was looking for answers to his questions. He is a (youth soon adult)
He had accidentally caught his mother with a lover, and for him the shock was greater because his mother's lover was a man of color. After the first discovery, the (youth soon adult) has continued to be attentive, you could say that he has secretly been spying on his mother, and he has become sure that for some time, probably a long time, she has had an ongoing relationship with this Black lover. The (youth soon adult) has become sure that his mother has developed strong feelings for the lover and he feels worried about his family and the future.
The (youth soon adult) has great trust in me, he has known me since ch..dhood, among other things I have babysat many times, and he is quite used to turning to me in confidence regarding questions about life. He knows that I take him seriously and that I really care about trying to help and support him with his questions and problems.
And he knows that I have experience of life, of relationships with more than one man, and also knows that I have experience of a man of color (but hopefully he only knows about one of my relationships with only one Black man..?).
The (youth soon adult) told me something like:
"- Lena, I must tell you that my mother is cheating on my father, she has a regular lover. And I believe she loves him, but I do not know if my father knows about it or not. And the lover is a man of color. I just want to ask you what you think, is my mothers love for her Black lover real or is it just a momentary love while they are having sex? ... "
And so on... He had many questions, he was shy and cautious at first, but after a while he told me very openly about things he had come to discover while he secretly sneakde up on them for almost six months. And it was clear that he wanted my opinion on the very fact that his mother's lover was a Black man.
Yes, I du understand that he was curious, maybe much to curious to be ”normal”. As a (youth soon adult), he found it exciting, and that after a while he had begun to experience all of this as sexually arousing, especially the fact that it was a Black man who was his mother's lover...
My answers were something like:
My very y....g man, you are a (youth soon adult) but you probably already know the answer.
That is impossible for me to answer with certainty,
regarding how it is for your mother, her relationship and whether she feels any kind of genuine love for her lover.
Generally and in many cases, from my own experiences, after conversations with my sister and with several of my close female friends, and after conversations with many white girls and women I have met over the years, I can pretty much generally tell you what I know, and what I have learned with quite a lot of certainty.
When women are given the opportunity to experience exceptionally good sex with a man, especially when this happens repeatedly many times, and the longer the relationship lasts, what was initially mostly feelings of horniness develops into a close intimacy with deep and strong feelings in almost all cases. If this is allowed to continue, it is very likely that in the vast majority of cases it will lead to love. At least some kind of love.
If the man repeatedly gives the woman exceptional sexual experiences, if he shows her that his horniness has also led to him starting to have deep and genuine feelings for her, then I am sure that in almost all cases it will lead to the woman developing genuine love for that man.
If she is married and the marriage is good and at least quite happy, if she is satisfied with her husband, if he is still able to make her horny and he still gives her satisfying sex, and she is satisfied with her marriage, then the woman's love for her husband can probably continue, albeit in a slower way, and she will probably start to feel two different kinds of love.
The old love lingers in everyday life and becomes a safe and secure love, albeit quite boring, and will probably not contain any spontaneous hornyness for her.
The new love will then become much hotter, and will contain the hot hornyness and very strong longing for new sexual experiences, and all this will strengthen her love and deepen her feelings for the new man.
But in those cases, in the vast majority of cases, if the woman, your mother, is the least bit dissatisfied with the marriage or with her husband, it will almost certainly lead to her love for her husband sooner or later ending, to be replaced by the new hot and wonderful love and lust for her lover.
I say that this development is largely driven by the woman getting the chance to discover exceptionally good sexual experiences in a new way and in a completely new dimension, that she gets to experience this repeated many times together with this special man and on a level previously completely unknown to her.
And my experience, as well as my sister's and a great many white women that I have talked to, we agree that a great many Black men give us exactly this, that is, exceptionally good sex.
The vast majority of us agree that in almost all cases these Black lovers are completely superior to our white husbands and boyfriends and superior to any white man we have ever met.
All women always agree with me when I say that it is comparable to the fact that almost all Black men are so much better at dancing compared to all regular white men who almost always lack the type of sense of rhythm and the suppleness of the body that almost all Black men and boys seem to have so easily, almost from birth, in a completely natural way.
We women who have experience with Black lovers in real life agree that the same applies, the superiority is always total, both on the dance floor and in bed.
It is difficult, if not impossible, for the vast majority of people to be able to relate to what exceptionally good sex is and what it means. The vast majority do not know what it is and I dare say that most will never experience it in their lives.
I thought I knew. I had had the chance to experience sex in quite a few different ways, and also on occasions very special and especially good sex. I thought it was wonderful and fantastic.
But then when I had the chance to start experiencing sex with my very best Black lover, all my previous concepts were put to rest. It was such a total and sensational awakening, that sexual experiences could be so exceptional, on a level and in a dimension that I had never imagined before, it was actually life-changing.
But it is a given that all the girls and women who have never experienced this, they have no reference and you have to understand that it is impossible for them to grasp.
And it is both obvious and completely understandable that the same applies to all white men. They think that they experience good sex and believe that they have the ability to give their woman wonderful and fantastic sex, which the very best white men also have (but the best are extremely few...). But my experience is that there is hardly any white man who has the opportunity to genuinely and deeply understand what exceptionally good sex means, because this happens in a way and in another dimension that ordinary white men never gain knowledge and experience about.
The very few best white men may believe that they give their woman incredibly good sex, but I know that hardly any white man, not even the few best, has the ability to give his woman exceptionally good sex.
It goes without saying that I unfortunately cannot answer your questions with certainty.
But my personal opinion and experience says that if your mother's relationship with her Black lover continues, the outcome depends a lot on the type of personality your mother has, what your parents' relationship is, and it depends a lot on how your father sees the matter.
If he does not know your mother's relationship with her Black lover today, or if he pretends not to know, then it is quite impossible that he will remain ignorant for very long, or will be able to continue pretending and denying.
If it is his desire that the marriage should continue under all circumstances, if he feels an unconditional love for your mother, then he may be able to accept her infidelity and her relationship with the Black lover. If he already knows this, then he may have given his consent and accepted everything. I know that such arrangements are not at all unusual and I have been taught that in such cases it is always easier for the white husband to accept that the wife has a lover provided it is a Black man, because then the white husband can convince himself that the wife will never leave him for such a man, or at least that the risk of him being left is less in the case the lover is a Black man.
However, I know that when new hot feelings of strong love take over for the woman, the man's skin color hardly matters, in which case it is not at all certain that the white husband's hope has any value...
So, my y. . . g man, I can't give you the answers, but I hope I've been able to give you some understanding of what's going on with your mother, regarding her feelings of love for both your father and for her Black lover, and what's going on in your family.
I know your mother very well and I don't think she currently has any thoughts at all about leaving your father now or in the near future and not splitting up your family. But I'm pretty sure she wants to continue the relationship with her Black lover, at least for a while. It wouldn't end well if your father or someone demanded that your mother end this right now.
The most likely thing is that your father already knows and accepts that your mother has her Black lover, he understands that it wouldn't be wise for him to try to force it to end right now, he has accepted that he would risk being the big loser.
My advice to you is to let your parents handle this in peace, it would only be embarrassing for your father, and it could cause serious problems, if you let him know that you know all this.
If your mother's relationship with the Black lover can continue relatively discreetly, then your father need not feel embarrassed that he has been forced to allow and accept it.
But if it becomes obvious that you know about it, if you discuss the matter with your father, then he may feel that he must act to make it stop if he is not to appear as a weak man, and then you may have caused unnecessary problems for yourself and your family.
And as I understand what you have told me, you do not mind your mother having a Black lover, provided that it does not harm your family, on the contrary, you have accepted this fact, and I have understood that you find it a little exciting.
I understand that you think that all other options, such as your parents having to divorce, are much worse options for you and for your family. So it is really a given that you should do nothing other than continue to pretend that you do not know anything and let the adults handle this in peace.
I would like to ask you to stop spying, but I understand that a (youth soon adult). boy's curiosity about sexual matters, and strong sex drive, means that you are unlikely to be able to fulfill it.
Therefore, this is important, that if you are going to continue spying secretly, you must be wise and do it in such a way that you do not risk being discovered, you must for your own sake and that of your family be wise enough and not create any risks of difficult consequences that you do not want.
- End -
For the reader, I can admit that of course, I have known for a long time that one of my best girlfriends has a lover, and that it is a man of color. It may be that I have encouraged her when she has been curious and has wanted to know everything about my sex life... (And she is not my only girlfriend who has experience with men of color...).
And I have known that her husband has accepted this.
At first very reluctantly, but over time, partly because he has had time to get used to the fact that this is going on regardless of what he wants and partly, most importantly, that their marriage and their own sex life have benefited from it and become better. So the husband has had an easier time accepting it fully because he has also per(male offspring)ally benefited from it.
But I did not know that their (youth soon adult). (male offspring) knew everything, and that moreover, after our conversations, he accepts it, and that he actually finds it exciting. I am quite convinced that he will continue to secretly sneak up on his mother and her Black lover and that the (youth soon adult) will be sexually aroused by this, and he will satisfy himself as all (youth soon adult) boys always do
4ヶ月前
