In defense of my use of the word "slut."
I wrote the PM below in response to a message I received from someone here on xHamster.
wwolf502
I regret if something I might have posted offended your friend. Personally, I never use the words "bitch," or "whore." I do sometimes use the word "slut," but never in a derogatory manner. Some people, particularly on a website like this one, perceive that word far, far differently than it's typical use in wider society. I gather you and your friend are probably aware of this fact. I have to presume that you sent this link to me because your friend was offended by my use of the word "slut" somewhere on xHamster. Again, I will reiterate that it's not a word that I would have used in a derogatory manner.
Words mean different things to different people, and even mean different things in different contexts. But they are just words. I like words and, as you can see from what I've written to you here, words are an important tool for me. As intelligent people know, understanding words in context is vitally important. So while I appreciate your sensibilities, and those of your friend, I reserve the right to employ certain words, like "slut," in certain contexts. I'm sorry if that disappoints or offends you or your friend. I guess I would suggest that you refrain from taking things so literally, and if it's any consolation, please try to remember what I said about not using that word in a derogatory manner.
Having said that, thank you for your PM. Best wishes,
~ww
In the message I received, a link to the following blog post was included. It's very politely phrased, but.... I guess I just didn't appreciate being chastised, and anonymously at that (and, oddly, via a spokesperson). What's more, anyone who thinks that the use of "words such as 'slut,' 'bitch,' and 'whore'" are solely the province of "certain male members" is living in a dream world and/or isn't paying attention to the words many women here are using. And isn't that kind of patronizing and offensive -- ignoring what women are saying?
Anyway, here's the post to which the link sent me:
rodent1's Blog
A few thoughts on respect
One of the most curious aspects in the behaviour of certain male members here is the casual manner with which they use words such as "slut", "bitch" and "whore" when referring to their female colleagues, as though totally divorced from the wider social dimension. It is almost as though they were abandoned as ******s in a distant forest and left to grow up without any grasp of the consequences of their own vocabulary or ideology.
I've written before about the fact that, despite this being a site dedicated to pornography, we must not turn a blind eye to anyone treating other members here with anything less than the respect they deserve. This applies in particular to women, since they face both the underlying sexism of modern society and the moralistic approbation heaped upon any of their gender who dares express even the scantiest interest in one of humanity's oldest fiction-forms.
This viewpoint is scarcely revolutionary; indeed, It is at its very core the simplest expression of modern manners. However, the fact that it still requires to be stated so categorically shows how far we still have to go before achieving a truly balanced society.
wwolf502
I regret if something I might have posted offended your friend. Personally, I never use the words "bitch," or "whore." I do sometimes use the word "slut," but never in a derogatory manner. Some people, particularly on a website like this one, perceive that word far, far differently than it's typical use in wider society. I gather you and your friend are probably aware of this fact. I have to presume that you sent this link to me because your friend was offended by my use of the word "slut" somewhere on xHamster. Again, I will reiterate that it's not a word that I would have used in a derogatory manner.
Words mean different things to different people, and even mean different things in different contexts. But they are just words. I like words and, as you can see from what I've written to you here, words are an important tool for me. As intelligent people know, understanding words in context is vitally important. So while I appreciate your sensibilities, and those of your friend, I reserve the right to employ certain words, like "slut," in certain contexts. I'm sorry if that disappoints or offends you or your friend. I guess I would suggest that you refrain from taking things so literally, and if it's any consolation, please try to remember what I said about not using that word in a derogatory manner.
Having said that, thank you for your PM. Best wishes,
~ww
In the message I received, a link to the following blog post was included. It's very politely phrased, but.... I guess I just didn't appreciate being chastised, and anonymously at that (and, oddly, via a spokesperson). What's more, anyone who thinks that the use of "words such as 'slut,' 'bitch,' and 'whore'" are solely the province of "certain male members" is living in a dream world and/or isn't paying attention to the words many women here are using. And isn't that kind of patronizing and offensive -- ignoring what women are saying?
Anyway, here's the post to which the link sent me:
rodent1's Blog
A few thoughts on respect
One of the most curious aspects in the behaviour of certain male members here is the casual manner with which they use words such as "slut", "bitch" and "whore" when referring to their female colleagues, as though totally divorced from the wider social dimension. It is almost as though they were abandoned as ******s in a distant forest and left to grow up without any grasp of the consequences of their own vocabulary or ideology.
I've written before about the fact that, despite this being a site dedicated to pornography, we must not turn a blind eye to anyone treating other members here with anything less than the respect they deserve. This applies in particular to women, since they face both the underlying sexism of modern society and the moralistic approbation heaped upon any of their gender who dares express even the scantiest interest in one of humanity's oldest fiction-forms.
This viewpoint is scarcely revolutionary; indeed, It is at its very core the simplest expression of modern manners. However, the fact that it still requires to be stated so categorically shows how far we still have to go before achieving a truly balanced society.
12年前
