Cont.

Was going to start a new story,but I'm still pretty upset from what happened earlier today, but I have edited my post because somehow no matter what, I always feel like "the bad guy" even if the other person is deserving, I can feel their pain or what I concieve it would be, and then doubt my actions blaming myself for their pain which slowly will consume me, till I'm in a stuggle with myself, angry, hurt upset, seeking
redemtion and self pity.

I don't even know if this person is on x hamster, I'd like to think so but the last few weeks have not been kind to me emotionally more than physiclly and I'm feeling prob the lowest I've ever felt.

I can't think or don't want to think of the future without this person in my life,how in my life who knows but it has to be there because our 2 becomes one.

2 becomes 1
is a quick way to see how I feel about "a shared connection"
I've written poems revolving around those 3 words,and others but they are pretty spred out over the interwebs. I think I may try to compile them and stick them here and maybe a more everyday blog type thing.








I have decided to take a break, divine intervention or some shit like that.
Haaa i don't know if anyone even read this so,... fuck you(jk)

So till I return a few important words--- Respect to all


I don't know if anyone has felt like a big stupid before but its how
I.m beginning to feel now. I had a blink of a lightbulb on a bike ride last night sort of like a clearing of the fog a sudden clearer than clear sharply focussed.

Its so simple now and I will admit my own blindness a simple near imposssible 1 in a million I was wrong, yes it has happenbed before would you believe that wrong was to do with a bike or bike wheel. I admit defeat andraise my white flag for I surrender
as my own doing has caused well, I'll leave it at that.

So in all saved by the bike, defeated by the bike,but most important peace for all,
wheres my bike, for I shall ride and ride.