LOST CLOTHES

It was a warm, sunny night in the Red Light District along Sacmore Street; a man entered the Pleasure Den All-Male adult entertainment center, the third largest along the strip. There was an abundance of magazines, novelties, DVDs, and everything else, including a peep show arcade and large theater.
He got fifty dollars worth of change from the clerk, and went about his business, having spent half of it on peep shows. Then he went into the theater. Within threee hours, he stormed out wearing nothing but stripped underpants.
"What happened to you?" asked the clerk.
"Somebody stole my fucking clothes!"
"And how did that hsppen?"
"Well, I went into the theater to relax and took off my clothes."
"Now that's just dumb; you should know better than to take off your clothes, especially in a public place; what's wrong with you?"
The man hesitated, feeling embarassed.
"Did you see anybody come out with clothes?"
"No, I wasn't payin' attention."
"Oh shit! My fuckin' Dick is exposed."
"Then cover it."
"Oh, you're a real smart ass."
"Sir, we're not responsible for lost or stolen property," said the clerk, pointing to the sign.
"So what am I supposed to do?!"
"I don't know."
The man rambled on and on about the losss of his clothes, and wanted to see the manager.
"He stepped out."
"Can I wait for him?"
"I guess so. But you'd better cover yourself."
People came in and out of the place staring, snickering, and laughing.
"It's not funny," he said, trying to cover himself, with a few standing to look.
"Oh, get the hell outta here!"
"Hey, don't talk to my customers like that. It's your own fault."
"Where's my fucking clothes?!"
"I dono. But if you don't calm down, I'll send you outta here naked."
The manager entered.
"What the hell is this?" he said, putting a box down. "Free show?"
"Ha Ha," said the man, sarcastically.
"Somebody stole his clothes, and now he's bitchin' like we had something to do with it."
The man wanted to hold the establishment liable, and threatened to sue, but was told he'd be wasting his time.
"Call the cops," said the manager. "Let them deal with this."
The clerk called the cops and within ten minutes, two female officers arrived, with the manager going to the back with the box.
"You call the police?" said the first officer.
"Yes mam, this guy just had his clothes stolen," said the clerk, stepping down from the register.
"Oh Lord," said the second officer. "How did this happen?"
He explained the situation to them, and they took his name, address, etc., and told him nothing could be done, because he wasn't supposed to take his clothes off in the first place and go to sleep.
"That's pure negligence," said the first officer. "You should know better."
Though he couldn't leave the place nude, he was allowed to call his friend who arrived and took him home.
"What a night," said the clerk.-----THE END