Struggling

i've been bad lately. i'm in a long-term, monogamous relationship (first time with no side-action). when we started dating, i had a few different booty calls - more accurately my booty would be called for by some other guys on a pretty regular basis. that all stopped when we decided to commit to each other. lately<span style="font-size: 16px; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"> i am struggling. the past few months i've found myself really wanting to get hit on, just looking for an excuse to not be willing or able to turn down some new dick or dicks. a couple weeks ago, i finally got hit on and inevitably cheated on him. in my defense, this was a very large dick - definitely in my top ten. to be honest, i've never said no to any dick that a guy was holding in my face, no matter the size. i suppose what i'm wondering is if i should try to get my bf to open up our relationship. his biggest concern is that i'll bring some disease home. obviously, that's always a concern, but i've always managed to stay free and clear even in my wilder days. even after cheating once, i'm still craving more. maybe i should set up a big gang-bang to get this fucked out of my system. maybe i just need to try harder to stay monogamous. please feel free to offer your opinions.</span>