Last Night of Vacation
I know, I know, I got back from my family holiday vacation weeks ago. I am slow to take the time sometimes to write these things down. You guys just send me so many messages that I try to respond to! (Forgive me that I can't keep up, there are just too many of you for one of me. Anyway, some of you who asked about my trip encouraged me to share about my last night. For those of you who don't know, I was not only on a trip with my family, we were visiting family. So, not very many chances to have fun at all! On top of that, I got sick the week of New Years. Not at all the way I want to spend one of the biggest party nights of the year.
By the last night of the trip, I was completely stir crazy. After everyone went to bed, I snuck out (for those of you who are detail nuts, I had an Uber pick me up because I in no way intended to be able to drive back) and headed for a bar I found in a quick search (I am not the kind of girl who could have survived before the internet!) I had gotten a new skirt and top on the trip (Christmas you know) but I did not have the right shoes with me. Call me crazy, but that matters. I wore total mismatching shoes, and took them off once I got in the bar. Thank God for being cute and smiling a lot (or maybe it was my tits since I didn't wear a bra) but not one kicked me out for not having shoes on! Oh, and yeah, I lost those shoes....sacrificed to the night, or some guy who loves women's shoes!
Yes, I took a credit card with me in my phone case. No, I never had to get it out and use it. I picked a bar with very friendly guys in it!!! I have a real problem with ever saying no to a free drink. No really, it's a problem. I am not very big, and that much alcohol gets into my system quickly. Those of you who know me know that I am pretty naturally flirty, but when I get to drinking, well, I go off the rails with my flirting. Yes, I danced in the center of a circle of guys. Yes, I danced on a table. Yes, I even danced on the bar. Yes, my shirt got wet. Yes, I flashed the bar.... and that was me on my good behavior. The other thing that happens when I drink a lot is I get very very very horny. Raise your hand if you know what happens after midnight when a short, drunk, barefoot blonde with nice tits, no bra, and a wet top gets very very horny. You win if you said she gets bent over a toilet in the men's room trying to keep her hair out of the water while also keeping her bare feet from slipping out from under her! You know what else happens, if she just so happens to have attracted the attention of a large part of the bar? She gets a few onlookers in the men's room when she is putting a smile on the face of the man who was smart enough to take her back there in the first place.
Well, let's just say after he screamed to his maker and high-fived a few onlookers, I had not gotten up, so another guy in pursuit of happiness slipped in. Literally. Mind you, I was very drunk, but I think it was cock five before all the motion from being rammed finally took hold with all the alcohol in my little tummy and I proceeded to provide an offering of tequila, vodka, beer and fried bar food to the porcelain god, who in turn welcomed me with open arms when the guy holding me up got surprised and released me face first into the mess I had just made. I was rescued by a nice woman who helped me into the lady's room and had on a tank top under her top that she let me have once I washed up.
The happy ending to this story? Well, I slept most of the ride the next day in the family van!
By the last night of the trip, I was completely stir crazy. After everyone went to bed, I snuck out (for those of you who are detail nuts, I had an Uber pick me up because I in no way intended to be able to drive back) and headed for a bar I found in a quick search (I am not the kind of girl who could have survived before the internet!) I had gotten a new skirt and top on the trip (Christmas you know) but I did not have the right shoes with me. Call me crazy, but that matters. I wore total mismatching shoes, and took them off once I got in the bar. Thank God for being cute and smiling a lot (or maybe it was my tits since I didn't wear a bra) but not one kicked me out for not having shoes on! Oh, and yeah, I lost those shoes....sacrificed to the night, or some guy who loves women's shoes!
Yes, I took a credit card with me in my phone case. No, I never had to get it out and use it. I picked a bar with very friendly guys in it!!! I have a real problem with ever saying no to a free drink. No really, it's a problem. I am not very big, and that much alcohol gets into my system quickly. Those of you who know me know that I am pretty naturally flirty, but when I get to drinking, well, I go off the rails with my flirting. Yes, I danced in the center of a circle of guys. Yes, I danced on a table. Yes, I even danced on the bar. Yes, my shirt got wet. Yes, I flashed the bar.... and that was me on my good behavior. The other thing that happens when I drink a lot is I get very very very horny. Raise your hand if you know what happens after midnight when a short, drunk, barefoot blonde with nice tits, no bra, and a wet top gets very very horny. You win if you said she gets bent over a toilet in the men's room trying to keep her hair out of the water while also keeping her bare feet from slipping out from under her! You know what else happens, if she just so happens to have attracted the attention of a large part of the bar? She gets a few onlookers in the men's room when she is putting a smile on the face of the man who was smart enough to take her back there in the first place.
Well, let's just say after he screamed to his maker and high-fived a few onlookers, I had not gotten up, so another guy in pursuit of happiness slipped in. Literally. Mind you, I was very drunk, but I think it was cock five before all the motion from being rammed finally took hold with all the alcohol in my little tummy and I proceeded to provide an offering of tequila, vodka, beer and fried bar food to the porcelain god, who in turn welcomed me with open arms when the guy holding me up got surprised and released me face first into the mess I had just made. I was rescued by a nice woman who helped me into the lady's room and had on a tank top under her top that she let me have once I washed up.
The happy ending to this story? Well, I slept most of the ride the next day in the family van!
6年前
