Submissive sissy

Submissive sissy.

Like most crossdressers, I started off trying to be as ‘convincing’ a woman as I
could be and, to be honest, it was often a difficult journey and essentially one without an ending.
I’ll not go into why I turned my back on that and acknowledged that, rather than being a
crossdresser, I am a sissy. That deserves another account and I plan to address that soon.
The briefest point I will make about being a sissy is that it’s about ultra-femininity, over the
top femininity. In short femininity that no genetic woman would espouse. It also comes
with elements of humiliation and degradation which have always been potent for me.

One problem with being a sissy as opposed to a crossdresser is that far fewer men
are interested in sissies than in convincing tgirls so that for a while expressing
myself as a sissy was generally a solitary one.

You wait for a bus for ages and then three come along at the same time. This has
been the case with me in the past year.

There are new developments in my sissy life. Suddenly I have contact with a
number of dominant men who actually prefer out and out sissies to
transvestites. It is almost as if having decided that my true nature is to
be a sissified mincing ****** that I am on a path and that there are more
helping hands than I realised.

A few months ago, I was contacted on Twitter by one of these guys who likes
the ultra-feminine sissy above all else. I know they are fairly rare but
they do exist as I have recently found. Master N is taking a long view of
our relationship and has obviously mapped out a training programme of
progressive sissification. From the beginning I have kept myself shaved of
all hair beneath the neck. I'm still working on chastity but here we rushed
it too quickly, plunging into me wearing a device 24/7 right away. It
wasn't long before I was rubbed raw by the CB6000. The Holy Trainer is
better designed but even so it's recommended that one build up usage and
this I have done to the extent that I am now wearing it for extended periods.

Each day begins with panty parade where I put on the panties I will wear
that day and take a photograph and send it to him immediately. We text
constantly and not just about me being a sissy but about life in
general. Despite this I know always that he is in charge. Sometimes we will
speak on the phone and he wants to know that just by vocalising I can
convey my sissiness. I think the voice can be the most difficult aspect of
feminisation but I have had classical singing lessons all my life and this
helps in terms of using a head rather than chest voice and I also work on
colouring the voice.

I also have to practise sissy deportment when alone. We have a few cam to
cam sessions each week where I must display myself in all my sissy glory,
while he watches critically. For these sessions I am entirely in pink -
corset, stockings, heels, bra, dress all in pink with a frou frou pink
collar and frilly pink wristlets. His verdict is that I have developed
exceptionally well in a few months. The next step is to be our first
meeting - we shall book a hotel room halfway between his place and
mine. I'll get there first and change and he will then turn up to view his
sissy creation. But that is on hold at the moment owing to the current health crisis.

About a year ago another dominant man has entered my life. Once again an
Internet meeting but very soon a date was made and he duly showed up. On his
motorbike. In his leathers. Well that excited me! He had a dinner
engagement and apologised in advance saying that he would only be able to
stay an hour! An hour...I am so used to ten minutes! Anyway I was all in
pink so once again happily presenting myself as a sissy. There was
wonderful chemistry between us and he loves the sensuality of sissy dress
and caressed my stockinged legs and pink satin bum for ages while kissing
me and telling me exactly what he wanted to do. Which he then proceeded to
do but slowly. I sucked his cock for ages while he said no woman had ever
taken him so deep. I reminded him of that established fact that sissies
give the best blowjobs ever. He said that I was only the third tgirl he had
been with and I was going to be the first one he fucked. I started in about
not having been fucked in ages, that I was too tight, but he would have
none of this.

Well it did hurt like Hell and because it did not simply slip in I think I
set up a mental barrier. Perhaps sensing this, he increased his verbal
contribution, no longer encouraging me but verbally abusing me telling me
that I am a whore and what a useless whore I am if I cannot take a cock. He
became increasingly dominant and I became correspondingly submissive and so
I relaxed and this did the trick as he sank his cock to its fullest extent
in my sissy cunt. He then proceeded to fuck me in earnest and it was not
long before my pain turned to pleasure and I was calling out my need to be
fucked. I wanted it to go on and on but he was over excited and soon shot.

The one hour he had planned became three all too quickly! He had traveled
fifty miles out of his way to meet me and had that fifty to drive back plus a
further fifty to get to his dinner date. He must have been terribly late.

And the third of my recent experiences is again with a dominant man -
Master R. At this stage it is still confined to cyber land - messages,
obeying instructions, taking photographs to please him - but most of all
cam to cam. How often have I been frustrated and disappointed by cam to
cam... I show myself in all my sissy finery while looking at a blank
screen and responding only to a voice, or more usually looking only at a
cock being jerked off. Not with this Master. From the beginning I have seen
his face and I must say I have never had more intense cyber sex. He insists
I look deep into his eyes as he tells me what a useless slut and sissy I
am. He makes me degrade myself in front of him, crawl to him, or prance and
mince around the room while he criticises any hint of masculinity in
me. His biggest turn ons, he tells me, are sissies, slaves, maids and
Stepford wives. I shall be all of these for him he informs me.

I'm still on probation with him but he is only interested in real meetings
so we are working towards that, if it ever becomes safe to do so.
He is a man of fifty-one and I have to say the most masculine man I
have ever encountered. He is a kind of handsome thug with a deep,
assertive voice and mesmerising eyes. Though he loves verbal abuse
there is nothing cliched about the way he delivers it. He is calm, relaxed,
never raises his voice and humiliates me in the most natural and matter
of fact way as if what he says is the simplest and purest truth. He is simply
dominating, assertive and controlling by nature. The effect on me is devastating.
He is like a d**g and I am addicted. I am into it immediately at such a depth that I
feel no shame or guilt about my behaviour. Once, with Master N’s permission,
I was permitted to cum on camera for Master R. It had been two weeks since
my last orgasm so the build up was there but I was told I would shoot on
command and that this window of opportunity would last one minute.
If I didn't shoot at sixty seconds that would be my chance gone for another two weeks.
So I played with my sissy clit while he calmly verbalised his plans for me and what I
would soon become. And then came the command and I shot, immediately.
It may just be the best orgasm of my entire life, due to responding to orders, being controlled
and the power of his verbal contributions, which reminded me constantly of my
place in he pecking order.

He knows his power over me, tells me that he knows I have looked for a
Master like him all my life, that it is my good fortune to have encountered
him.

So as you can see I have suddenly found myself being satisfied on a deep
psychic level and it is simply wonderful. I have found that even cyber
connections can address our psychic needs. I am very content these days!