Another fucking Christmas has passed, and normal life can resume. I haven't always despised Christmas. As a c***d, even as a teen, I looked forward to the festive season, not for the gifts but rather the closeness and security of being part of a family. That is long gone, and it seems I feel more bitter with each passing year, seeing happy families celebrating together. Because of my family (and I use this term loosely) I find no joy in the holiday. I don't want to go into great detail - of the screaming and abusive words exchanged - but since coming out I consider myself an orphan. Yet this y… 続きを読む

Hi diary. This might come as a surprise, after all the pain i have poured into your earlier pages. I have some news. Admittedly it is early days, and fate can have a nasty tendency to be unkind, but i have news. It thrills me. Lifts me. Scares the shit out of me. Almost two months ago i fell in love. Not the shallow affection, not the fire that burns hard and bright and leaves barely glowing ashes moments later that so many others experience. I mean true, deep, and meaningful love. I don't want to love by distance, waiting to see the green light of online status. I don't want to keep having s… 続きを読む

Day One 11/8 This whole week has been horrible. I have been such a mess. I feel like a broken faucet, tears - sometimes desperately needed, most times completely ******** - spontaneously running down my face. One month ago the love of my life sent me a friend request. malenek. A day before that, i was a slave, under contract. I have always been a little jaded when it comes to friend requests...no offense meant but so many here are so shallow, so demanding...so i held off approving her along with so many others. I finally relented, added her, and then we started talking. I still want to kick my… 続きを読む

Have any of you found yourselves...despite a real life relationship, distance, and against your better judgement...falling in love with someone here? I have...… 続きを読む

<table width="307" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" bgcolor="white" style="background-color:white;border-style:solid;border-color:black;border-width: 1px;padding:4px;"> <tr> <td> <div align="center"> <br> <a href="http://www.humansexmap.com/showmap.php?mapid=map5bd092fe60f807.45397509"><img src="http://www.humansexmap.com/sexmapsmall.jpg" alt="" height="169" width="175" border="0"></a> <p><font face="Helvetica, Geneva, Arial, SunSans-Regular, sans-serif">Find out where I've journeyed<br>on the <a href="http://www.humansexmap.com/showmap.php?mapid=map5bd092fe60f807.45397509">Map… 続きを読む

8/25 Mistress has directed me to post here each time i have dirty thoughts, whilst She is not around to discuss them. Each time i find myself dwelling on dirty thoughts i am to stop exactly where i am, irrespective of my surroundings, and masturbate to climax. Today it has been difficult to concentrate on anything but sordid thoughts.. yesterday She talked me through a scene that is still vividly fresh. It is 3.30pm and i have cum 6 times. Fortunately i have been home for five of them. The last though was waiting in line at the gas station. There was a girl two spots ahead of me, wearing ti… 続きを読む

i have been told to share an experience in detail. It was completely humiliating, which was so refreshing. Even now, a week later, thinking about it makes me instantly wet. i am an owned slut, property of fuqqmehard, but permitted to chat with other users here. It is rare to find a true domme amongst so many wannabes, but sometimes the rare diamond does surface. Last week i met GothicAlina. Chat started as it usually does - introduction and small talk. Of course the next question posed was where she could see pictures of my naked flesh. i naturally and without hes… 続きを読む

* This wasn't written by me but rather for and about me. i hope you enjoy this delicious story of humiliation and abuse as much as i do * Kitty was in the wrong place. She was given directions and mixed them all up. She was supposed to meet Helen at the bar and they were to have a nice drink and chat. Helen told her that she would be late and she should wait for her. She promised that she would not stand her up as she had done to Helen last week. As she walked into the bar she noticed it was not the kind of place she was used to. It was dark and loud. She found a table along the wall and sa… 続きを読む

"Please nooo...don't..." "What the fuck did you say slut? You forget your fucking place" You swiftly backhand me across the face with a resounding CRACCKK. i cry out in shock and pain, my body slumping in my restraints, the pain at my wrists intense. "Please...Mistress Erin...please don't pierce me more. i'll do anything you want but please don't do that...or let boys use me" Tears are flowing down my face, dripping off my chin and down onto my swollen and impaled nipples. "That's right you snivelling cunt. You will do exactly what I want, when I want, and with whoever I choose. You. Bel… 続きを読む

my breath comes in short harsh gasps as the needle touches my nipple, pricking the sensitive flesh. "Stay still cunt, or this is really going to hurt you. Not that I really give a fuck as to how you feel" "Nonono please" i moan The doorbell sounds loudly and i twitch on the end of my restraints. The needle rakes across the meat of my breast, drawing a thin line of blood which begins dripping slowly towards my belly. "You stupid fuck. I warned you. Now I'm definitely NOT going to make this easy. What the fuck now?" Moving swiftly you open and pass through the doorway, slamming it he… 続きを読む

Consciousness returned slowly, and as it did a number of things strike me at once - my arms and shoulders are aching...my hair, lank and damp, hangs across my face, obscuring my sight...and my jaw aches horribly. For some reason i cant focus properly, and it dawns on me that i am bound tight, my arms above me and my legs obscenely spread open below me. Looking down i see a fleshy colored blur, and i realize i am naked. Long minutes pass before i hear the sound of footsteps approaching, the creak of a door opening on dry hinges. "Its about time you woke upp whorelet. I was beginning to get im… 続きを読む